Friday, April 29, 2005

It was so much fun working for the Government

I mentioned a word that got me thinking. TEAMBUILDING.

It's gone out of fashion now and we are back to every man for himself but it was THE training choice for a while.

And I was mulling this over and I can honestly say

I loved working for the Government in the 90s.


That is probably a bit insensitive as many people found it a very threatening time - but it was great!

First there was all this training. And training could involve so much drinking that some people were too sick the next day to get more training. And there is nothing like watching your previously superior workmates get all messy and uncouth. so good! Often I laughed so much I cried. Sometimes I laughed till I cried about things that weren't even funny.

And I learnt to be Culturally Sensitive. See I never realised that it wasn't enough to not care what colour or religion or whatever people were, you have to be sensitive to these differences as well. So I took that on board. And I am grateful I learned that, even if there are some gaps in the training - I learnt cultural sensitivity towards all things Maori but never got the equivilent training in Chinese or French for instance. Still it was a start.

Then there was the teambuilding. Now quite early in the piece I realised that teambuilding was actually invented by trainers so they could have a great laugh at the expense of some poor (hungover) bastards that had been sent on a training course. They invented games like blindfolding everyone, telling them a number and then expecting them to line up in order without speaking to each other. Now stumbling round blind until you walk into someone who then thumps you three times is probably really funny if you are standing back watching but is not at all amusing when you are number 10 looking for 9 and 11 to stand between. Trust me I've tried it. And I didn't feel part of number 3s team at all... Then there was the catching people when they let themselves fall, and being led round an obstacle course blindfolded and in a line. Really lucky departments got to try rockclimbing and white water rafting and bungy jumping. WINZ staff got to try a private plane (that would have been a bonding experience)

Anyway it was all over when the restructuring came - cos the first to go were the trainers.

I survived three or four restructurings. It was honestly a whole heap of fun (serious). I know some people found the whole thing threatening but the redundancy payouts were big enough to be similar to a small lotto win so what the hell - either way you won. And I do have some sympathy for people round me who lost sleep over it, but I never did. It was just so crazy it was great.

First they would announce they were restructuring and X many people were to go. Then the Union would bowl in, promise not to take this lying down, and vanish again until the next restructuring. After that there would be some Counsellor employed, usually some dizzy female who would wander round one day a week stroking everyones egos and telling them it would be really good for them in the long run if they were redundant. After a bit she would realise some people weren't actually on any hit list and would ignore them, even if they wanted to talk about something (which would have been a foolish move anyway if you were looking for good advice - but I will keep my opinion on counselling until some later date)

Eventually they would devise some sort of test or interview and make a decision about who could stay and who could go. Usually the decision seemed to make no particular sense, the person who had been taking it easy for years got to stay and the efficient person got to go. Possibly they just drew names out of a hat and all the testing and stress was just for fun.

Some of the time they asked if anyone would like voluntary redundancy. Then they refused to give it to them. (probably in the hope that they intended to leave anyway so would resign and save the redundancy payout)

Someone who got made redundant in one of the early rounds ended up staying because someone else resigned. In the next round they applied for voluntary redundancy and were turned down as they were deemed essential.... amazing they could go from dispensible to indispensible in six months...

Someone who had a part time job scored a full time one while someone else had to go....

It made no sense whatsoever so you couldn't take it personally (not after all the counselling anyway)

Then there were heaps of leaving parties and more drunken debaucery and everything would settle down for a while until they decided it needed to be done again.

Sadly once there was only half as many staff there wasn't time to spend on training any more.

4 comments:

wino said...

Oh I forgot about the how to write your CV training, and the how to get through an interview. Was never sure if that was to help you keep a job where you were or go out and get yourself a job somewhere else.

Way to go Clods - applying for another position and getting it :-)

Chris said...

Just been through all that with Hubby who was made redundent after 35 years with the same firm..what price loyalty huh? We did the worry thing, the 'dont care' thing, the 'wouldnt want to work for the new regime' thing ( that one stuck btw lol). We did the CV thing and the interview thing all the time knowing he wasn't on the 'list' (Schindler's list??)
After 6 months he is now back..as a contractor..doing his old job
Makes you wonder!!

Anonymous said...

Now yo know what your next post can be about Wino...I love this stuff.

wino said...

Awww darn it Caroline - I was trying to get back to life on the 'farm' and I have a surgery date to get wound up about. I take it you want 'why seeing a counsellor will thoroughly mess you up'? *grin* or was it something else? Happy to offer an opinion on anything you desire (have always been very opinionated my mother tells me)

Am still pondering life at the complaints desk too which is always a little bizarre....

So much to say I can't decide to say any of it. :-)